Super Craig/Quotes

This page lists all notable quotes voiced out by Super Craig (Craig Tucker) in South Park: The Fractured But Whole.

Overview
Super Craig's quotes mainly revolve around his quintessential Brutalist persona; he often talks about punching his enemies. He also often acts indifferent or critical towards his allies.

When in combat, some of the other superheroes occasionally criticize how Super Craig's costume only consists of a piece of paper with the capital letter 'S' attached to his regular clothes; this leads to him just nonchalantly brushing them off.

He is notably kinder towards his partner Wonder Tweek (Tweek), especially during combat where he gives words of comfort and encouragement whenever Wonder Tweek begins getting nervous or delivers a successful attack, although this only happens if their counselling session with Mr. Mackey is completed; before that Super Craig will be giving his usual cynical quotes towards Wonder Tweek.

Field/Story

 * During The Chains of Super Craig
 * "He's not just a normal guinea pig. He belongs to me and my ex-boyfriend. That's right Super Craig is gay."
 * "Be careful. This is probably the most challenging mission you've ever been given."
 * "I'm really attached to this guinea pig, man!"
 * "A Super Craig without a Stripe is like Supergirl without a bicycle."
 * "A Trammalian's sense of smell is so sensitive they can detect a presence of a single Zorm spore in a class-6 east-Trammalian sandstorm."
 * "My mom stepped on my first guinea pig by accident and broke its back."
 * "I suspect my dad poisoned Stripe the Third when he pooped in the dining room."
 * During Rise of the Fourthies
 * "OK, that was pretty badass."
 * During Ghost Reconciler
 * "Get my fucking laptop back from that prick."
 * "The fucking guinea pig? Ugh, fine."
 * "You know where Stripe's cage is...Go get him and give him to that fucking asshole."
 * "When you give that to Tweek you make sure he knows that when you WALK OUT ON SOMEONE, you don't get to make up the rules anymore!"
 * "Counselling? Tweek wants me to go counselling with him? No way."
 * "Tell him there's no way I'll go to counselling unless YOU go too. I need my support team."
 * During The Chaos Gambit
 * "Dude what're you doing here, you're supposed to be a Freedom Pal, remember?"
 * During Therapy Wars
 * "I think he has something he should say to me."
 * "Tweek, he's right."
 * "We're only going to get rid of these Expectations and everything else, if we do it together."
 * "It's OUR laptop, Tweek."
 * During The Thin White Line, Jared spared
 * "You didn't fart him to death, but that doesn't mean we couldn't beat him a little more."
 * During The Thin White Line, Jared not spared
 * "You're a steel-eyed fart killer. Fuckin' A."


 * During The Thin White Line, in the basement
 * "You guys are fucked."
 * During Farts of Future Past
 * "This is not a trick. It's me, Craig."
 * Female New Kid idle
 * "You know Butthole, you kinda look like a boy AND a girl, or neither..
 * "It's weird, he's a boy and I'm gay but for some reason I'm not attracted to the New Kid"
 * Waiting for selfie
 * "And I'm bored."
 * Attacked
 * "Asswipe!"
 * "Fucker!"
 * "Shithead!"
 * Farted on
 * "Oh, go - The Douchebag is an asshole, you guys!"
 * "Ugh! Such a dick."
 * "Get away from me!"
 * "Jesus, dude!"
 * "When you least expect it I'm going to inflict some damage on your nuts."

Battle
Super Craig: "No, we don't." Super Craig: "There will be no encores." Super Craig: "Lights, teeth, whatever." Wonder Tweek: "Did he say that?" Super Craig: "No!" Captain Diabetes: "Thanks, Super Craig!" Super Craig: "Yeah, whatever." Captain Diabetes: ​"There! Nobody drinks and drives on Captain Diabetes' watch!" Super Craig: "Maybe we should pull his pants up now." Super Craig: "I would rather die." Super Craig: "If by nudge you mean punch the shit out of, sure." Captain Diabetes: "Um, OK. I'll just be over here taking notes on your technique, Super Craig!" Super Craig: "Not much to it. Punch and punch again. Jot that down if you want." Super Craig: "If it pisses off at least one shithead, it's productive." Super Craig: "Nobody cares, dude." Super Craig: "You hit someone?" Captain Diabetes: "Thanks, Super Craig! Hey you wanna hang out, play D&D or something?" Super Craig: "Yeah, no." Super Craig: "Check your meter, Scott, because you're fucking delirious." Captain Diabetes: "Thanks for noticing, Super Craig!" Captain Diabetes: "Gosh. Thanks, valued ally!" Super Craig: "OK, dial it back." Chaos Minion: "Yo no." Super Craig: "Emote this." Super Craig: "Only if you try not to be a dickweed next time." ​The Coon: "It's a deal." The Coon: "God dammit, Super Craig! Show some respect to your colleagues." Super Craig: "Why start now?" Super Craig: "Sure, you bet." Super Craig: "I doubt it." The Coon: "Probably Kyle." Human Kite: "Fuck you, dude." / "Seriously, fuck you." Super Craig: "Sure. I'm fucking fabulous." Super Craig: "The key is not to give a fuck." Super Craig: "You fantasy dorks don't stand a chance." High Jew Elf Kyle: "You take that back!" Super Craig: "You're just mad cuz it's true." Super Craig: "Shut up, already!" Thief Craig: "Seriously. Fuck." Human Kite: "No mercy, guys!" Super Craig: "Don't rush me, Kite." Super Craig: "Look, dude. You're lucky I even showed up." Super Craig: "I don't need your praise, but thank you." Super Craig: "I'm really open to hitting either of you." Super Craig: "Oh boy, just what we needed." Super Craig: "Man, Morgan Freeman's kind of a dick." Super Craig: "Dude, you are trying way too hard." / "Dude, dial it back." Super Craig: "Gross, dude." Super Craig: "You can call it whatever you want. I just punch the shit out of shitheads." Super Craig: "Dude, you are trying way too hard." / "Dude, dial it back." Super Craig: "Dude, you are trying way too hard." / "Dude, dial it back." Super Craig: "Dude, you are trying way too hard." / "Dude, dial it back." Super Craig: "Dude, you are trying way too hard." / "Dude, dial it back." Super Craig: "Not sure "unique" is the right word." Mosquito: "Well, you really need to punch your enemies, Super Craig?" Super Craig: "Uh, yeah." Mosquito: "All right, then. Don't be a hypocrite." Mosquito: "I would if I could!" Raisins Girl: "The kitchen made an extra order of fun fries, and I thought of you!" Mosquito: "Oh, god!" Super Craig: "NO THANK YOU, MA'AM!" Super Craig: "Does it look like I care?" Mysterion: "Well, that's kind of my point." Super Craig: "I've got a black belt in not giving a shit." Mysterion: "I got a lot of pathos." Super Craig: "You should get that looked at." Professor Chaos: "Thanks!" Super Craig: "How about you FUCK OFF." Super Craig: "You mean their body?" Professor Chaos: "Oh-ho, good one!" Super Craig: "OK, that got in my mouth." Professor Chaos: "Hey, I'm paying you guys good money and I want to see results!" Super Craig: "Find me after this." Super Craig: "Good luck, dick." Sixth Grader: "Stupid Craig?" Super Craig: "I said fuck you." Sixth Grader: "Oh, I'm definitely giving you a Polish Bike Ride, Stupid Craig!" Sixth Grader: "Relatively we- Oh my god, we're so gonna fuck you fourthies up so bad!" Super Craig: "Uh-huh, sure." Super Craig: "Like I give a shit." Super Craig: "Yes." Super Craig: "You're not gonna last long fighting all of us yourself, past... me" Thief Craig: "I wouldn't be so foolish, Stupid Craig! BUSHIN NO JUSTSU!" Super Craig: "We had a lot less time to make this game." Super Craig: "Yeah, and look where it got us." Thief Craig: "Huhhh... Yeeaup." Super Craig: "Yeah, we've seen some shit." Thief Craig: "Fuck me? Fuck you!" Super Craig: "I KNOW!" Toolshed: "Don't be a dick, Super Craig." Super Craig: "Speak up. Couldn't hear you over my massive middle finger." Super Craig: "I should fucking hope so." Tuppperware: "I am part man, part machi-" Super Craig: "Don't care." Super Craig: "Sounds about right." Super Craig: "Super Craig believes in you, so believe in him." Wonder Tweek: "All right, I'll try!" Super Craig: "What? That's gay." Wonder Tweek: "You're gay." Mosquito: "Wait... I'm confused." Super Craig: "Wait, me?" Super Craig: "Are you serious right now, Tweek?" Super Craig: "I'll go when I'm ready and not before." Wonder Tweek: "Shut up, shut up, I'm thinking!" Super Craig: "Dude! Go already." Super Craig: "Workin' on it." Super Craig: "The key is not to give a fuck." Wonder Tweek: "No!" Super Craig: "Yeah, it's Civil War, dude." Wonder Tweek: "I'm good at storms too, right, Super Craig?" Super Craig: "Yes, Tweek. You're the best at storms." Wonder Tweek: "No, you're lame. You're like the lamest lame of all lame time!" Super Craig: "That was lame too." Wonder Tweek: "Oh, now you suddenly give a shit?" Super Craig: ""Chill out?" Really?" Wonder Tweek: "At least I'm TRYING, Super DICK!" Super Craig: "Hmm. Good one." Wonder Tweek: "Fine. Choke on a burrito next time you need a pick-me-up." Super Craig: "I was busy!" Wonder Tweek: "You're always busy!" Super Craig: "Deep breaths, Wonder Tweek." Super Craig: "Take it easy, Tweek." Wonder Tweek: "Don't "dude" me!" Super Craig: "It's OK. You can just revive me." Wonder Tweek: "Your sidekick? What!" Super Craig: "Come on.... You know what I mean."
 * Selected
 * "Yeah?"
 * "What?"
 * "Super Craig."
 * Battle start and turn start
 * "Let's dance! I mean, not literally, because I don't dance. Let's punch."
 * Battle start, versus Shub-Niggurath
 * "Fuck this. Let's go."
 * Battle start, versus Thief Craig, Farts of Future Past
 * "Are you serious, that's so fucking lame. Ugh... Guess I gotta take this asshole on."
 * Turn start
 * "I'm not sorry for what I'm about to do."
 * "I'm really hoping we can finish this up soon."
 * "My turn."
 * "Here I go."
 * "Oh. Am I up?"
 * "Super Craig!"
 * "Oh, I can finally go? Thanks."
 * "All right, my turn."
 * "Did someone call for a fist in the face?"
 * "It's Craig time. I mean Super Craig time."
 * "Get excited."
 * "It's my fucking turn, yeah."
 * "Who needs to get punched the most?"
 * "Good news, everybody! It's my turn."
 * "Super Craig, reporting for duty."
 * "It is I, Super Craig."
 * "Super Craig to the rescue."
 * "Oh, is this my turn already? OK."
 * "OK. Here we go."
 * Turn start, versus Buca De Faggonchini Cook
 * "I get cranky when I'm hungry."
 * Turn start, versus Red Wine Drunk Randy
 * "Uh, your pants are down."
 * "If you want Diabetes, you're gonna have to go through me."
 * Turn start, versus Thief Craig
 * "So if I kick my own ass, none of this will ever happen?"
 * New Kid turn start
 * "Go nuts, New Kid."
 * Idle
 * "Hmm. What superhero shit should I do?"
 * "The longer we wait, the harder this punch is gonna be."
 * Ally idle
 * "Go any time. Like, right now. Go right now."
 * "Are we doing this, or what?"
 * "Somebody wake me when it's my turn."
 * "Are you gonna go or what."
 * "This sucks. Someone go!"
 * "My legs are going numb from standing around."
 * "I was told the life of a superhero was action packed. That was a lie."
 * Ally idle, versus Raisins Girls
 * "I'll admit, an order of wings sounds good."
 * Ally idle, versus Woodland Critters
 * "This is like the world's worst petting zoo."
 * Human Kite idle
 * "Just do a laser thing."
 * "Hey Kyle, or Kite, or whatever. Do something."
 * New Kid idle, Farts of Future Past
 * "It's too late for me, past me, but you could avoid all this if you just make friends who don't suck."
 * First time using Mega Fist Punch
 * "It’s powerful AND it knocks them back!"
 * Using Mega Fist Punch
 * "Mega Fist Punch!"
 * "Mega Fist Puncheru!"
 * "MEGA PALM PUSH!"
 * After using Mega Fist Punch
 * "You gonna cry, shitstain?"
 * First time using Shining Hate Finger
 * "This one doesn't do any damage at all, but it gives me a shield and Enrages my target, forcing them to attack me!"
 * Using Shining Hate Finger
 * "Come and get me, dick."
 * "Suck on this."
 * "Got something for ya!"
 * "Put this on your Coonstagram."
 * Using Shining Hate Finger on Freedom Pals
 * "Here's what I think of your Freedom Pals."
 * Using Shining Hate Finger on Mysterion
 * "Hey, Mysterion, got something for ya!"
 * After using Shining Hate Finger
 * "Do your worst, shitheads."
 * "Go ahead. Hit me."
 * First time using Omega Crash Extra
 * "This move is awesome against relatively weak enemies like these guys."
 * Using Omega Crash Extra
 * "I have had it with this shit."
 * "Omega Crash Extra!"
 * "I am out of fucks to give."
 * Using Omega Crash Extra against Freedom Pals
 * "Suck on this, pajama pals."
 * Using Furry Death, The Hundred Hands of Chaos
 * "Chaos-crushing time."
 * Using Omega Crash Extra or Furry Death against Chaos Kids
 * "Aluminum-piercing fist."
 * After attacking Almighty King Douchebag
 * "You're NOT my king!"
 * After ally attacking
 * "That looked painful. So... Mission accomplished."
 * "That's how you bring the pain."
 * "That's going to leave some scars."
 * "That works."
 * After Call Girl using Blocked, Phone Destroyer or Flash Mob
 * "I suppose I should comment, but honestly I can't even do it."
 * After Captain Diabetes using Coma Combo
 * "You knocked the shit out of that shit-for-brains!"
 * "Sweet dreams, shithead!"
 * After Captain Diabetes using Sugar Rush
 * "And I thought diabetes just made you woozy and stuff."
 * "Thanks, that saves me a punch."
 * After the Coon using Coon Claws
 * "Thanks for saving me the trouble of flipping that shithead off."
 * After Fastpass attacking
 * "Dude, where's the fire?"
 * "Way to move like you give a fuck."
 * "Dude, pace yourself."
 * "Nothing wrong with a solid wallop."
 * After Fastpass using Blind Side
 * "Dude. Chill."
 * After Fastpass using Hit and Run
 * "Was that a sonic boom or just their jaw cracking?"
 * After Mosquito attacking
 * "Nice work. Now excuse me while I go throw up."
 * "That's some nasty shit, dude."
 * After Mosquito using Pandemic Pestilence
 * "Uh, no. No, no, no. No, no, no, no. No."
 * After Mosquito using Zika Rush
 * "It's all fun and games until we're the guys bleeding from our eyes and assholes."
 * After New Kid attacking
 * "You're really into this superhero stuff, huh, New Kid."
 * After New Kid using Elemental Onslaught
 * "Wow that was the coolest storm ever."
 * After New Kid using Dragon Swagger
 * "I'm impressed, Buttstuff."
 * "You really pissed them off now."
 * Targeted by Unground, The Chaos Gambit
 * "Fuck yeah!"
 * After Profesor Chaos using Chaos Blast
 * "They don't know what it hit them, and neither do I to be honest."
 * After Professor Chaos using Chaos Confuse-O-Tron
 * "More Chaos then? Surprise, surprise."
 * After Toolshed using Spiral Power
 * "Makes as much sense as kite lasers, I guess."
 * "Maybe add some "pew pew" sounds next time."
 * "You definitely voided the warranty on those things."
 * After Toolshed using Drillslinger
 * "That's cool, I guess. You have the power of wearing a well-equipped toolbelt."
 * "Say, you got anything to eat in that tool belt?"
 * After Wonder Tweek attacking, after Therapy Wars has been completed
 * "I taught him everything he knows."
 * "You really pounded that guy, Tweek!"
 * Enemy defeated
 * "Yeah I saw that comin'."
 * Using healing item on ally
 * "This is another time I saved your life."
 * "Eat it!"
 * After Ally or Self using Ham Radio
 * "OK, that was pretty badass."
 * After using healing item on ally
 * "You need this more than I do."
 * Burning status cured
 * "Thanks, that was...way too hot."
 * Healed
 * "Thanks, Mom."
 * "Right on."
 * "Hey, that's pretty nice."
 * "When my health bar goes up I feel all tingly."
 * "I did need that."
 * "OK, that feels pretty good, I guess."
 * "I was kinda hungry."
 * Healed and protected
 * "Preciate it."
 * "Hey, thanks."
 * Protected
 * "Cool. Now I'm extra impervious to bullshit."
 * "I got to admit, I feel kind of invincible right now."
 * Reviving
 * "You guys drag me into this and I'm always the one having to save your butt."
 * Revived
 * "Thanks, I'll remember this the next time I want to flip you off."
 * "OK-OK. I'm up."
 * "Thanks, I think."
 * Attacked
 * "My fist is going so far up your ass, I'll be able to help you floss."
 * "Laugh it up. The last kid who did that to me is dead."
 * "Oh, come on."
 * "That's going to cost you big time."
 * "Fuck!"
 * "Dude!"
 * "You asshole."
 * "That's bullshit."
 * "What doesn't kill me makes me hate you more."
 * "Go fuck yourself."
 * "Fuck! I'm going to kick the shit out of you for that."
 * "Ow, hey!"
 * "Bullshit!"
 * "Give me a break."
 * Targeted by Ground, The Chaos Gambit
 * "Dammit!"
 * Ally attacked
 * "That sucks for you."
 * "Ouch for you, dude."
 * New Kid attacked
 * "Don't just take that lying down, Butt-Boy."
 * "That sucks for you, New Kid."
 * Wonder Tweek attacked, before Therapy Wars has been completed
 * "Tweek's hurt? What a surprise."
 * New Kid low health
 * "Don't die on us, New Kid."
 * After a Timefart Glitch
 * "Turn's cancelled, dipshit."
 * "No turn for you, shithead."
 * "We'll take that turn off your hands, thanks."
 * After a Timefart Pause
 * "That's a powerful stink."
 * After a Timefart Summon
 * "And now we have two Buttholes."
 * "I wouldn't kick an extra Butthole out of bed."
 * "Oh, look what crawled out of New Kid's ass."
 * Ally defeated
 * "Bummer."
 * The Coon defeated
 * "Coon's down."
 * New Kid defeated
 * "Butthole looks kind of dead."
 * Ally Attack Up
 * "Fuck 'em up, buddy."
 * Ally Chilled
 * "Think of a warm breeze and a hot chick in a bikini..."
 * Confused
 * "I can take anything they've got. I'm Super Craig."
 * Victory
 * "Bravo. Great job. Etcetera, etcetera."
 * "Are we done here?"
 * Victory, New Kid defeated
 * "Get up, New Kid. We beat them without you."
 * Victory against Raisins Girls
 * "I wanted to order a lemonade, but I guess it's too late for that."
 * Victory, after joining Freedom Pals
 * "Freedom Pals win again, or whatever."
 * Dialogue
 * With Call Girl, ally or self idle
 * Call Girl: "We need to work on your costume, Craig."
 * With Call Girl, after Super Craig or Wonder Tweek using Eros Eruption
 * Call Girl: "Can I see that again?"
 * With Captain Diabetes, turn start
 * Captain Diabetes: "Knock their lights out!"
 * With Captain Diabetes and Wonder Tweek, Wonder Tweek defeated
 * Captain Diabetes: "Wonder Tweek, no! The world needs you, Super Craig needs you!"
 * With Captain Diabetes and Red Wine Drunk Randy, turn start
 * Super Craig: "If you want Diabetes, you're gonna have to go through me."
 * With Captain Diabetes and Red Wine Drunk Randy, Red Wine Drunk Randy defeated
 * Randy: "All right, I'm gonna take a cab."
 * With Captain Diabetes, after attacking
 * Captain Diabetes: "You and me should do some of that crossfit stuff, Super Craig."
 * With Captain Diabetes, after using Mega Fist Punch
 * Captain Diabetes: "Sometimes those villains just need a little nudge, eh, Super Craig?"
 * With Captain Diabetes, after using Shining Hate Finger
 * Captain Diabetes: "Is that really the most productive behavior right now?"
 * With Captain Diabetes, after using Omega Crush Extra
 * Captain Diabetes: "Yeah, I got a move like that too."
 * With Captain Diabetes, after Captain Diabetes attacking
 * Captain Diabetes: "Oh, wow. You see what I just did, guys?"
 * Super Craig: "I like your style."
 * With Captain Diabetes, after Captain Diabetes using Coma Combo
 * Captain Diabetes: "You should feel honored! You just got walloped by one of the world's most popular superheroes!"
 * With Captain Diabetes, Captain Diabetes attacked
 * Super Craig: "You know how to take a hit, Diabetes."
 * With Captain Diabetes, after Captain Diabetes attacking
 * Super Craig: "You fight all sloppy and shit, but you get the job done."
 * With Chaos Minion, turn start, The Hundred Hands of Chaos
 * ​Super Craig: "Who needs to get punched the most?"
 * With The Coon, after attacking
 * The Coon: "See, Super Craig, you can emote when you want to."
 * With The Coon, after using Mega Fist Punch
 * ​The Coon: "Not bad, Super Craig, but try not to slouch next time."
 * With The Coon, after The Coon attacking
 * Super Craig: "You do something? I was too busy not giving a fuck."
 * With The Coon, attacked
 * ​The Coon: "Try to give a fuck, will you Craig?"
 * ​The Coon: "You gonna start taking this seriously now, Super Craig?"
 * With The Coon and Human Kite, turn start
 * ​Super Craig: "Who needs to get punched the most?"
 * With Fastpass, attacked
 * Fastpass: "You OK, Super Craig?"
 * With Jared when using Shining Hate Finger 
 * Tweek: I wish i had your confidence Super Craig
 * With High Jew Elf Kyle, battle start
 * High Jew Elf Kyle: "Our King won't let you pass!"
 * With High Jew Elf Kyle, turn start
 * Super Craig: "You know, the Stick of Truth is just a stupid twig, right?"
 * With High Jew Elf Kyle and Thief Craig, High Jew Elf Kyle turn start
 * High Jew Elf Kyle: "So are our eye lasers, are they powered by some type of bio-energy or-"
 * With Human Kite, battle start, Rise of the Fourthies
 * Super Craig: "Are we really going to take on the Sixth Graders?"
 * With Human Kite, idle
 * Human Kite: "Go any time, Craig."
 * With Human Kite, after attacking
 * Human Kite: "If only you put as much effort into your costume as you did that move."
 * With Human Kite, after using Mega Fist Punch
 * Human Kite: "You beat the crap out of them dude, good work."
 * With Mitch Conner, turn start, Farts of Future Past
 * Mitch Conner: "Well, who do you attack, Freedom Pal?"
 * With Mitch Conner, Mitch Conner using Turn Steal
 * Mitch Conner: "I have a turn now, too."
 * With Morgan Freeman, after using Shining Hate Finger on Morgan Freeman
 * Morgan Freeman: "You can't do shit to me, Super Craig."
 * With Mosquito, Mosquito turn start
 * Mosquito: "Taking a blood sample, now!"
 * With Mosquito, after attacking
 * Mosquito: "Your punches make the blood pool nicely under their skin, Super Craig. Prime for drinking."
 * Mosquito: "Isn't it great to have super powers?"
 * With Mosquito, after ally attacking
 * Mosquito: "My tube-like mouth parts are agape in amazement!"
 * With Mosquito, after Call Girl attacking
 * Mosquito: "And I thought dengue fever was deadly!"
 * With Mosquito, after character other than Mosquito attacking
 * Mosquito: "You gonna finish that?" / "I call dibs on seconds!"
 * With Mosquito, after Fastpass attacking
 * Mosquito: "Wow! Imagine how many eggs I could fertilize in a day if I moved as fast as you!"
 * With Mosquito, after Mosquito attacking
 * Mosquito: "Always happy to lend my unique talents to the cause!"
 * With Mosquito, after Mosquito using Bug Bite Barrage
 * Super Craig: "You know you don't really need to drink that shit, right?"
 * Super Craig: "Next thing you know you'll be laying eggs."
 * With Mosquito and Raisins Girl, Mosquito attacked while Charmed
 * Mosquito: "I'm back, thanks, guys!"
 * With Mysterion, self or ally idle
 * Mysterion: "Hey Craig, think you could have a shittier costume?"
 * With Mysterion, after attacking
 * Mysterion: "Nice technique."
 * With Mysterion, after Mysterion using Dread Rush
 * Super Craig: "You're so melodramatic, dude."
 * With Professor Chaos, battle start with Mecha Minion Chaos Supreme
 * Super Craig: "Nice ride. Sorry about your dick size."
 * With Professor Chaos, Mecha Minion Chaos Supreme attacked
 * Professor Chaos: "OK, just shake it off, Professor."
 * With Professor Chaos, after using Mega Fist Punch
 * Professor Chaos: "You hit them right in their weak spot, Super Craig!"
 * With Professor Chaos, after Mini Supreme using Dog Shitter, The Hundred Hands of Chaos
 * Professor Chaos: "Mark your territory!"
 * With Professor Chaos, after Professor Chaos attacking, Chaos Minions first group battle, The Hundred Hands of Chaos
 * Super Craig: "Hold still, Chaos creature."
 * With Raisins Girl, Raisins Girl bleeding
 * Raisins Girl: "Anyone have a bandaid? But, like, a cute one with unicorns on it."
 * With Redneck, idle
 * Redneck: "Hey, is that Craig Tucker over there? Shit, I know your dad, he's good people. I'm sure he won't mind if I tan your hide a bit."
 * With Sixth Grader, turn start, Rise of the Fourthies
 * Super Craig: "Hey, fuck you, I'm Super Craig!"
 * With Sixth Grader, after first using Shining Hate Finger, Rise of the Fourthies
 * Super Craig: "This one doesn't do any damage at all, but it gives me a shield and Enrages my target, forcing them to attack me!"
 * With Sixth Grader, after first using Omega Crash Extra, Rise of the Fourthies
 * Super Craig: "This move is awesome against relatively weak enemies like these guys."
 * With Sixth Grader, Sixth Grader defeated
 * Sixth Grader: "At least I didn't die a virgin."
 * With Stephen Stotch, after attacking Stephen Stotch
 * Stephen: "Your parents will hear about this!"
 * With Stephen Stotch, Stephen Stotch preparing Ground
 * Stephen: "Any of you been swearing? That's a grounding!"
 * With Thief Craig, round 3 start
 * Thief Craig: "This is a job for the King's cunning rouge!"
 * With Thief Craig, Thief Craig turn start
 * Thief Craig: "That's really your whole costume, Super Craig?"
 * Thief Craig: "So they finally talked us into playing superheroes, huh?"
 * With Thief Craig, ally idle
 * Thief Craig: "Boy, our future selves are pretty tough."
 * With Thief Craig, after attacking Thief Craig
 * Super Craig: "Seriously, fuck me."
 * With Thief Craig, attacked by Thief Craig
 * Thief Craig: "You could be at home watching TV right now."
 * With Toolshed, after Toolshed using Drillslinger
 * Super Craig: "Cool. But you'd probably get more out of those tools if you sold them on eBay."
 * With Tupperware, after using Shining Hate Finger
 * Tupperware: "I detect anger in your enemies."
 * With Tupperware, after Tupperware using Hot Swap
 * Super Craig: "Nice. So are you supposed to be like a cyborg or a robot or what?"
 * With Tupperware, attacked
 * Tupperware: "Tupper-sensors detect a high level of indifference from Super Craig."
 * With Wonder Tweek, Wonder Tweek turn start, after Therapy Wars has been completed
 * Wonder Tweek: "There's so many of them - I-I don't know if I can do it, AUGH!"
 * With Wonder Tweek and Mosquito, Wonder Tweek first turn start, Civil War
 * Wonder Tweek: "I am Wonder Tweek, Champion of Justice!"
 * With Wonder Tweek, Wonder Tweek second turn start, Civil War
 * Wonder Tweek: "I will right wrongs and triumph over evil - and that means you!"
 * With Wonder Tweek, Wonder Tweek turn start, fighting Mitch Conner, To Catch a Coon
 * Wonder Tweek: "Gah! Could Coon be telling the truth here?"
 * With Wonder Tweek, idle
 * Wonder Tweek: "Holy crap, hurry up, Craig! I hate it when you do this!"
 * With Wonder Tweek, Wonder Tweek idle
 * Super Craig: "For a spaz, you sure can move slow."
 * Wonder Tweek: "Oh man, is it my turn?!"
 * With Wonder Tweek, after attacking, after Therapy Wars has been completed
 * Wonder Tweek: "Yeah, fuck 'em up, Super Craig!"
 * Wonder Tweek: "I wish I had your confidence, Super Craig."
 * With Wonder Tweek, after attacking Wonder Tweek, Civil War
 * Super Craig: "Ever get the feeling life is punishing you for being a dick, Tweek?"
 * Wonder Tweek: "Craig, what gives?!"
 * With Wonder Tweek, after New Kid using Elemental Onslaught
 * Super Craig: "Wow that was the coolest storm ever."
 * With Wonder Tweek, after Wonder Tweek using Supreme Lightning, before Therapy Wars has been completed
 * Super Craig: "Lame."
 * With Wonder Tweek, after Wonder Tweek using Supreme Lightning and Icicle Strike, before Therapy Wars has been completed
 * Super Craig: "God, that power again?"
 * With Wonder Tweek, Wonder Tweek using Icicle Strike, before Therapy Wars has been completed
 * Wonder Tweek: "Time to chill out!"
 * With Wonder Tweek, targeted by Soothing Showers, before Therapy Wars has been completed
 * Super Craig: "When it rains, it bores."
 * With Wonder Tweek, Wonder Tweek revived, not by Super Craig, after Therapy Wars has been completed
 * Wonder Tweek: "Craig, you can't be bothered to save your love?"
 * With Wonder Tweek, attacked, after Therapy Wars has been completed
 * Wonder Tweek: "Oh my god! They hit Super Craig!"
 * With Wonder Tweek, self or ally other than Wonder Tweek attacked, after Therapy Wars has been completed
 * Wonder Tweek: "Hey! You leave him alone!"
 * With Wonder Tweek, attacked by Wonder Tweek, Civil War
 * Super Craig: "Ugh, dude!"
 * With Wonder Tweek, defeated, after Therapy Wars has been completed
 * Wonder Tweek: "Super Craig! No! I can't live without you!"
 * With Wonder Tweek, Wonder Tweek defeated, after Therapy Wars has been completed
 * Super Craig: "Hey! That was my sidekick!"

Super Craig: "Who you calling frail, dick?" Wonder Tweek: "Yes, I do! You think it's easy controlling the weather?" Super Craig: "I hate you, dude." Human Kite: "Don't ask me! Ask the hand!" Super Craig: "Not happening." Professor Chaos: "Why, thank you, Craig. I'm glad you're impressed by my super Chaos Minions!" Super Craig: "Do I sound impressed?" Captain Diabetes: "Does not!" Professor Chaos: "Does too!" Captain Diabetes: "Nuh uh!" Professor Chaos: "Yeah huh!" Captain Diabetes: "Does not!" Professor Chaos: "Does too!" Captain Diabetes: "Nuh uh!" Professor Chaos: "Yeah huh!" Super Craig: "Oh my god, will you shitheads fucking stop already?"
 * Unsorted
 * "Not today, Shub. You bitch."
 * Mysterion: "And now you see the frailty of life."
 * Super Craig: "We get it, you have weather control powers, don't have to make such a production out of it."
 * "Tooth Fairy's declaring chapter 11 tonight."
 * "You really put the fear of kites into me, shithead."
 * "Feel free to name the plate they put in your skull after me."
 * "Face, meet fists. Fists, face."
 * "Ugh, OK Tweek, you made your point."
 * "OK, this is getting super old."
 * The Coon: "Dammit, I didn't kidnap ButtLord's parents!"
 * Super Craig: "What the hell's your problem?"
 * "Another choice track from Craig's greatest hits."
 * Professor Chaos: "I'm gonna push your buttons till you scream like a little girl, Super Craig."
 * Super Craig: "Shit. The minions got you."
 * "Minions suck."
 * Professor Chaos: "Ha-ha! Behold, my minions! Chaos grips their soul and tears them apart!"
 * "Kill the minions."
 * "Good shooting, Tex."
 * "So much for safety first."
 * "Now for some Craig time."
 * "I now pronounce you fist and face."
 * "Heavens-to-Betsy. Did I make you angry?"
 * "Your sign-language lesson for the day."
 * "You're a sick fuck, dude."
 * "Boy, this guy's REALLY into sandwiches."